You look so fat!!!! Have you put on weight?? What happened to you?
Ok so these are questions and statements that I would never ask or say to anyone and hope that no one else would (unless seriously worried about a loved one’s health).
Yet, I receive the opposite of these questions and statements on a VERY regular basis. You look so skinny! Have you lost weight? Are you eating enough? What is happening with you?
Granted I have always been skinny and always received these questions for as long as I can remember. However, I have had three different people ask me this in the past two days! When does it end? As a skinny man, it has always been my goal to put on weight, possibly for this reason. I’ve only really been working on my weight gain for the past five years and I want to do this in the best way possible and in a healthy manner.
I train at the gym which I absolutely love and yes I have put on a good amount of weight when I increased my calorie intake by 1000 calories. However, I noticed that my body fat was also increasing. Therefore, my new goal is to put on weight that is muscle mass and not body fat. I want to train well and eat a healthy diet. This takes a lot of time and effort, there is no quick fix. This is fine for me, I’m in no rush. However, the constant questioning and statements about weight is both tiresome and saddening. Now, I know this is not intentional. These are lovely people saying this and they would be horrified to know if I was offended. However, I am honestly surprised that I don’t have more of a complex about this. I guess I’m a tough cookie, quite resilient and do not let comments bother me too much.
Just another side note – unfortunately this is not people saying I’m skinny in a good way. For example, they could say, you’re looking slim or you look very toned…instead of saying skinny with that look of worry and disbelief in their eyes. Another point to note is, my weight very rarely changes on a daily basis. Therefore, I think people must forget how slim I am and when they do see me after a few weeks, they have forgotten and assume I have lost weight or I am not eating enough. People who know me well, know that I am always hungry and always eating. I love my food and am extremely grateful that I don’t need to worry about putting on much weight. Good genes I guess 😜.
Anyway, thanks for reading. That is my rant over. What are your thoughts on people’s own weight? Would you comment on someone’s weight? I don’t think people realise that being called skinny is just as bad as calling someone fat, which I personally would not do. Therefore, it really baffles me 🤷🏼♂️.

Many thanks to you all,
Wayne ✌🏽
Thank you so much for talking about this because I’m going through something kind of similar at the moment! I grew up chubby and have always been a bit on the bigger side. However, over the recent years I lost some weight while living in Canada and now that I’m back in Kenya and everyone is seeing me for the first time in a few years all I hear is “wow you have lost a lot of weight” and not in a good way. It’s kind of annoying because I feel like it was the same people telling me I was fat. I’m sure some of them mean no harm and some definitely do but it’s just a bit annoying when people talk about someones weight. I personally would never mention someones weight because it’s none of my business, it makes zero difference to my life and you never know what someone is going through that made them gain or lose weight. For many it’s a sensitive topic that could be a trigger.
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Absolutely Pooja! It’s so frustrating. We don’t need approval from others. I remember once being told I was too talkative at work. So I tried to talk less in work and then I was told I was being too quiet 🤷🏼♂️🤣.
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It is never appropriate to comment on people’s weight no matter what. I have been all sizes, heavy and thin(er) sometimes through effort, sometimes through illness, and it is never comfortable when other people comment on my weight out of concern, compliment, or otherwise. (Even the seeming harmless compliment “Have you lost weight? You look great” has an implication that I used to be fatter and they noticed it. (And if I’m losing weight due to mu illness, it’s just plain hurtful.) I don’t want people’s opinions of my body size…I am insecure and hard enough on myself as it is. I would never want to make someone to feel that way.
Good luck on your own health journey. I hope you are surrounded by more kind people than thoughtless ones.
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Totally agree with everything you said. Sometimes it’s just best to keep our thoughts to ourselves. Not everything has to be verbalised ☺️. As long as we are happy with ourselves, that’s the main thing.
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And don’t you hate it when they tell you how lucky you are. Not sure skinniness acquaints to luckiness.
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Haha yessss…I get that a lot also!
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Hi Wayne. You look great in your pics! Isn’t strange that people feel the need to comment on a person’s weight as if they do not ever look at themselves in the mirror. When I was skinny, everyone commented on it and now that I am waaaay fatter than I should be, they comment on that too. 😂🤷🏽♀️I guess it’s a reflection of our society’s obsession with weight. Here’s hoping that this positive beauty trend leaves us all appreciating each other as we are.
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Yes you’re so right. People will comment no matter what size we are. It just makes me doubt myself. I think as long as you’re happy with yourself, that’s all that matters ☺️
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Living in China I get the “you really got fat” comment as a form of greeting on a regular basis. Despite the accuracy of the comment I could do without it.
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Oh no!!! There is just no need to verbalise some things 🙈
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I know, right!?
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I am overweight but I do know people that have a slim shape and have had similar comments as you have. I know some people don’t intend to be mean when they say it but it can come across that way. You look great in your pictures by the way.
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Thanks so much! I agree. They aren’t being mean at all. I just hate hearing it from people 🙉
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Muscle weighs more than fat….which means you may find gaining muscle will increase weight. Learned that years ago when a lady I worked with started working out in preparation for her wedding and started to freak out that she was smaller but heavier. Someone explained that to her. O Work healthy…no steroids or crap like that.
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Thanks for that! Hopefully I well get heavier too 😜
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I, on the other hand, am fat. And people do say things to me about my weight. Here’s my response….
I was born a golden retriever – I am not a
Toy poodle. And, yes, right now I look more like a Newfoundland, but I will never be a toy poodle.
So you are maybe a greyhound. We are all different. We are supposed to be different.
Be you, Wayne. You seem to be an okay person to me with a big heart, and a big brain. Let “them” be in their small world. They are probably perfect and who wants to be like that!
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I love this response!!! Thanks for sharing. You’re right, we are all different. I know people don’t mean to be unkind. Some things are better left unsaid 🙊.
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